Faith. Fear. They have been common themes that keep coming up lately. I keep seeing reminders all around me that we should not fear. That we should walk by faith, not by sight. This has really spoken to me and it has been placed on my heart to write this blog.
Two years ago I found out I was pregnant with my youngest son, Luke. This pregnancy did come with anxiety because it followed three consecutive miscarriages. I did not know for certain that I would be bringing a baby home or would have empty arms like before. This time felt different though. A few months prior, I was having a very emotional day. I was in my prayer closet and crying my heart out to God. Talking to Him about my hurt and fears about my fertility journey. I then heard Him whisper in my heart “Don’t worry. I’m not done yet.” I immediately felt a sense of peace. A peace that could only be from Him. These words are what helped me get through my pregnancy with Luke, when fear tried to suffocate me.
Whatever it is that you are walking through right now, whether it is trying to conceive after loss, or being pregnant after loss, or something entirely different, I am here to encourage you that you do not have to live a life of fear. God tells us many times in scripture that we should not fear and reminds us that He is always with us. After being through something as traumatic as pregnancy loss, it is easy to fall into anxiety, but do not let it consume you. When I was going in for ultrasounds, which was where I faced the most anxiety, I would pray and read scripture. Sometimes all I could say was “I will have faith over fear” over and over in my head. I saw a quote recently that said “Fear sees the problem. Faith sees the promise.” I know that my pregnancy with Luke would have been so much harder if I did not cling to my faith and the promise God had given me. When I was afraid, I put my trust in God. God has proven He is good, always. When I was in the pits of despair after my losses, He comforted me. It was in my trials that my faith was strengthened. He does not like for us to suffer, but knows it can bring us closer to Him and make us depend on Him. He does have a purpose for us and He does care. He is all knowing and does want the best for us. He is working everything together for our good.
I am attaching a song that I recently discovered called “Fear Is Not My Future” by Brandon Lake and Chandler Moore. I hope it blesses you like it has me.
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